I am not familiar with the “Husband-Coached Childbirth” (unless you mean the “Bradley method”) so all I can comment on is what I am learning from “The Mongon Method” As I understand, there is only one “HypnoBirthing” method that coaches for a “pain free” birth and that is the one I have referred to in this article.

I want to address your suggestion that I not give “false hopes” to other women:

Yes, I agree with you that a special “disclaimer” that not all births can be pain free would be appropriate, but at the same time, I wonder where we draw the line in sharing our experience versus influencing others (unintentionally) to doubt what they can achieve?

I would do an equal disservice to women to suggest that because I did not have my desired results (in anything in life) that others shouldn’t expect the best for themselves. HGM is all about transcending our limitations and creating the results we seek, even when there are multiple examples of it being “seemingly” impossible.

Rather than “false hope,” tens of thousands of women are indeed reporting that they ARE having a “pain free” birth and this is something to take notice of! Even in spite of special circumstances that arise. (Joli’s comment above is a good example)

This is a blog dedicated to “possibility” and challenging the deep social conditioning that teaches us that “what we see is what we get.”

You mention being “deceived” by what others told you, in their efforts to encourage you, because it provided you with a false hope?

If I can humbly ask? Was your birth plan solely about being pain free? It seems you went the extra mile to have a natural birth and from what little I can tell, you accomplished that? It was free of unnecessary intervention and you had a healthy and safe (although painful!) delivery. Perhaps, all the preparation you did allowed you to keep your peace of mind in an incredibly challenging situation so for that…how awesome!!

If in fact you would do it all over again, I would simply challenge you to rethink feeling “deceived.” If you did not have a special circumstance the second time around, why would you not aim for a “pain free” birth again?

@Evelyn – HpnoBirthing has certainly fascinated me too, especially for my second birth! Not only for the no pain aspect, because I can take that, but also for the power and faith it returns to women as participating in something they were designed to do. Thanks for joining me in this journey!

@Michelle – Wow Michelle, I’m humbled..7 Children How amazing. I hope you enjoy the book, I would love for you to tell us what you think with your experience, please come and visit again

@Sommer – Thank you for your support Sommer, as always.

@Joli – Your story is EXACTLY what has inspired me a great deal. Your calm and ability to deliver in this circumstance, because we have to accept that they do obviously happen, but wow! Awesome. Thanks for visiting.

I was totally ready for a peaceful birth, but all that changed the moment early labor began. I gave birth 24 hours later, naturally and in the water, to a beautiful and healthy boy, but the labor was out-of-this-world, insanely agonizing because he was posterior. I KNEW he was posterior before giving birth, but everything I had read said that that shouldn’t matter–I should still be able to give birth peacefully and without much pain. Even my midwives told me not to worry. I still feel wronged by that. I began labor remembering everything I had practiced and even read about posterior births, but nothing could have truly prepared me for that pain.

To make a long story short, there was absolutely nothing I could have done to avoid that pain. Having my tailbone stretched back by the baby’s badly-positioned head was not the same as a painful contraction, and my contractions were insanely painful because of his position anyway. I came away from the birth relieved that he eventually turned around and glad to have given birth naturally, with no meds, BUT much wiser and more down-to-earth: next time, I will not expect a pain-free birth, though I will do all the same things I did with this birth. I will still AIM for as little pain as possible, but know that things can go very differently from what I expect. I felt a bit deceived, having prepared the way I did, only to find out that there ARE some occasions when no amount of preparation or meditation or relaxation techniques will work because something is abnormal.

My only request? Don’t give women false hopes! Promote your relaxation techniques, but please include a note to women in unusual situations that they may, indeed, have a very painful labor. I wish I had known that. Oh, how I had prepared!

Long story short we ended up having the birth at the hospital in the OR (operating room) because we found out at 37 weeks that she was breech and it’s required by law. HB really helped me with this shift as they have a whole section dedicated to accepting major changes.

My labor lasted about 8 hours start to finish . I was able to push her out with no drugs, using all the skills I learned in HB. I felt like I was in a deep mediation. Totally calm and relaxed, breathing deeply and concentrated in the moment. I never once felt scared or out of control. The “pain” was totally manageable and I never got to the point where I wanted drugs (and I should mention that I’m a huge wimp and HATE pain).

The OR was full of interns and other doctors simply observing the birth because they had never seen a vaginally breech delivery. Our daughter was born healthy and happy and has been an angel ever since.

So good for you! You’re going to have an AMAZING birth! I’m already looking forward to the next one. : )

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